To the Good People in My Life

Perhaps it is a fact that as you grow older, you know more and more good, really good, people who have bad things, really bad things, happen to them and because it is so wrong it seems nothing you can say or do can really help. 

In the past few weeks, people who I know as very good and kind people have had really bad things happen in their lives, and while I have shared that they are in my thoughts and prayers – and they are – that just does not seem to be enough.

Over the past couple of days, I have been thinking of the writings of Harold Kushner, author of “When Bad Things Happen to Good People” and “The Lord Is My Shepherd: Healing Wisdom of the Twenty-third Psalm.” 

These two books have helped shape my own views on how to find peace when life is not turning out the way we had hoped.     

Above all, I do not believe that God’s plan for us includes having terrible things happen in our lives or the lives of others as part of a grand scheme. 

I do believe, although I have to stop and really remind myself of this, that when bad things happen, God is there to offer comfort and healing; and sometimes this comfort and healing comes from those around us. 

Kushner writes, “Should you know someone who has suffered a loss, whether loss of a loved one, loss of a job, or loss of a relationship, and you hesitate to contact your friend because you feel inadequate to the situation, because you are not sure you have the words to help her, please overcome that hesitation and reach out to your friend. Call her, visit her. You don't have to say anything besides "I'm sorry, I feel bad for you." Human souls are nourished by relationships, and your friendship, your going out of your way to show concern, has the power to heal a person's soul.” 

“The role of God is not to explain and not to justify but to comfort, to find people when they are living in darkness, take them by the hand, and show them how to find their way into the sunlight again … when we used up all of our own strength and love and faith, there really is a God, and he replenishes your love and your strength and your faith.”

For the very good people that I know and care for - who have been faced with difficulties, sorrow and loss - I am sorry, I feel bad for you, and I hope God – whether through his direct spirit or through the people who care for you - is replenishing you with love, and strength and faith.